Loser Current

You know those Halloween costumes that cheap, lazy parents bought their kids in the '80s? The ones that involved a plastic mask and a plastic apron with the name and a picture of the character on it?

I know you do. But, if you're going to play dumb with me, here is what I am talking about.

Donald Duck does not wear a picture of himself.

Anyway, I am certain that my boyfriend invented these costumes in a past life. Seriously. He insists on adding a name tag to every costume. He's tried to convince me to wear a name tag with my Halloween costume every year.

This year, I've started working on my costume early, and despite the fact that it is a clearly identifiable character, he has once again suggested a name tag. Now, if a name tag is appropriate for the costume, then it makes sense. But, there are only so many times when that is the case. If I were planning to dress up as a waitress or a game show contestant, then his suggestion to wear a name tag would be spot on.

Carmen Sandiego does not wear a name tag.

But, I am not putting together a waitress or game show contestant costume. I am putting together a Carmen Sandiego costume (which, by the way, is awesome).

Carmen is a thief, not a camp counselor. She doesn't wear a name tag. She does, however, wear a pretty distinct outfit that cannot be mistaken for much else. If someone doesn't get the red trench coat and fedora, then they wouldn't know who Carmen Sandiego is anyway, so the name tag would be useless. They either get this costume, or they don't. I think my boyfriend may fall into the latter category, as he also believes that Carmen wears lingerie under her coat and carries sex toys.