I Couldn't Care Less

More and more I am finding that bars in this area tend to be the biggest freak shows. Last night I left work early and ended up at dollar draft night with a couple of friends (I can never turn down cheap alcohol). After an hour or so, I found myself surrounded by the damn nerd herd. Anyway, I was feeling particularly stand-offish and just wanted to hang out with my friends.

The ringleader of the group seriously began to invade my personal space, blabbing about who-cares-what. I kept my eyes glued on the nearby TV screen. After about 10 minutes of his rambling, he noticed that I was not paying any attention to him, so he asked if I liked Sports Center (it was the show that was on at the time). I told him "Not a chance. It's just that I could not possibly be less interested in anything you have to say right now."

He started laughing! I couldn't believe it. He thought that it was a joke.

Seeing that this wasn't working, I then pulled out my cell phone and started texting all my friends, telling them that I was talking to the biggest loser in the world. I hoped that he would look over at what I was saying.

He may have, but that didn't stop him from talking to me. His only redeeming quality was that he was willing to throw down the plastic for my bar tab from before he arrived.

The rejection hotline was made for people like him. Although, he probably thinks that is all a joke too. What a moron.